Thirties vs. Twenties. Amy Poehler briefly touched on this in a recent Good Hang episode—yay, Amy Poehler!—but I was already thinking about it. I’m coming to the end of my thirties, and realizing that my thirties were much easier than my twenties in a lot of ways. Sure, I’ve had a lot more responsibility and stress in my thirties, but in my twenties I was also very stressed because I was trying to get my first job and figure out who I was. I graduated college and lived with my sister, then lived with our parents. It’s a tale as old as time for people who graduated around 2008/2009/2010/2011. Recessions aren’t fun. I was twenty-four when I met Luis, and then we slowly started finding enough success to be able to get a place together. But we didn’t get married until I was thirty. My twenties were filled with a lot of uncertainty. Things are still often uncertain, of course, with the way things are in this country, but we also have more stability. So I hope people in their twenties realize that things aren’t always going to be as hard as they are for them at their age.
Globes that are golden. Speaking of Amy Poehler, I was so happy to see her win the Golden Globe for Best Podcast. I would’ve turned it off if she hadn’t won. I’m still annoyed about Ricky Gervais winning Best Stand-Up Special. It should have been Kumail Nanjiani. Luis and I saw many of the nominees, most of the winners. I really want to watch Adolescence. I like watching these award shows because they help me find new shows and movies to watch that I may otherwise not hear about. We got pizza for it, and I had a tasty at-home Redbull Sunrise (since the Buffalo Wild Wings near us closed, we’ve started just making them at home.)
It was jarring not to see an In Memoriam segment, especially with how dramatically sad some of the famous people’s deaths were last year. But it made the show shorter by not having it, so… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Divisiveness feels like gaslighting. If you’d told me when I was in high school that we’d be living in a time where our own government thinks it’s okay to shoot a woman three times in the head in broad daylight and then lie about it and try to vilify her, I would have told you that you were crazy because that’s Nazi behavior and America is not Fascist.
What’s been some of the most terrifying, crazy stuff to me is the fabrication of the truth. Nineteen-Eighty-Four is invoked all the time, but lately the quotes from it are so apt they’re painful. We were all supposed to learn from it how to be better, not how to copy Ingsoc.
The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”
– George Orwell, Nineteen-Eighty-Four
Struggling with books. Firstly, I’ve been struggling with my copy of The Spy Who Came In From The Cold because it was nearly pristine when I got it off a little free library shelf, but now that it’s been traveling in my purse every day, it’s slowly falling apart. I fear that, by the time I’m ready to put it back in the little free library, it will be a stack of paper barely held together by glue from the 90s. I don’t know how it’s happening but every time I put it out of my purse, another bit of the front or back cover has fallen off. I’m not violent with it; all I do is put it down into my purse between my cell phone and my wallet. It’s nothing crazy. It’s kind of funny, but I feel bad.
I’m enjoying reading it. It’s not my usual thing, but it’s good. My favorite character is Liz. I have a bad feeling she’s not going to make it.
The other book I’m reading, Seeing Other People, continues to make me feel disappointed in some ways. It’s well-written and sweet, a lot of the time, but the name is so punny and the cover looks more light-hearted and youthful than it feels to me. Something about the tone has been throwing me off the whole time. I’m reading an ARC copy, so I wonder how much it changed in the final version. I just thought it would be funnier than it is. It’s mostly sad. Beautifully written, but not easy to read at the end of a long day in our currently bleak world.
Literary update. I’ve been slowly working through the edits of my It’s A Wonderful Life-inspired novel, using the notes my dad gave me. I’ve been feeling less motivated to edit it, mainly because I’m excited to move on to writing the next story draft. But I’m doing it. I also sent the story to some friends to read, just as a little present. No feedback required.
I want readers. My main reason for wanting to be a published author is just that I want people to read my stories and enjoy them as much as I enjoy creating them.
Sara Mazariegos 