Tag: Writing

You only meant well (well, of course you did.)

Sara Mazariegos

We had an awesome Halloween party last weekend. “Awesome” in the original meaning of the word.


Luis created a Riddler (and Batman) themed escape room with a bunch of riddles and puzzle boxes. Everyone had a lot of fun. I was mostly proud and in awe of him. He made videos for the introduction and the ending, and everyone thought they’d been provided by an escape room company or the company that made one of the puzzle boxes. But it was all him. 😊 I helped, but it was awesome because he is awesome.

FRIEND AT PARTY: Are you anxious?
ME: Always.
FRIEND: No, but like, not just because you’re Anxiety. Are you feeling anxious?
ME: Yes.
FRIEND: Would you like a hug?
ME: I always want a hug*.

Halloween being on a Thursday is a bummer, though. I’m not wearing my costume at work, because I think it’ll become uncomfortable (especially the boots) after eight hours in an office and I’d want to just change out of it when I get home. Instead, I’ll change into it when I get home, and be Anxiety for a few hours. Mostly while watching Arachnophobia with Luis. Seems fitting.


On Sunday night, we watched Late Night with the Devil, which was a perfect movie to watch for Halloween. I wish it embraced the 1970s aesthetic more, and I thought the introduction “documentary” wasn’t necessary, but otherwise, I liked it. I had no idea it was mostly Australian, too. Indie films like that are always good to promote.

We’ve been watching a lot of movies that take place in the 1970s lately.

I caught a cold and took the day off yesterday, sleeping as much as I could and being generally lazy. For some reason, at about five AM, I was having panic attacks that kept me from being able to fall back asleep. I’ve never experienced THAT side effect before. I definitely do not recommend it. I had to go downstairs and read a book for a while, next to one of our cats, in the cool living room. Then I was able to take a nap and eventually go back up to bed.

I made the executive decision to stop writing the cat romance novel for now (after giving it an ending that works, even if it’s at the 76,000-word point instead of the 80,000 I was going for.) I was feeling pretty burnt out with it. I plan to fix it and retool it next year unless a newer, shinier idea presents itself.

For now, I’m taking a brief break. Next week, I will resume the rewrite of my It’s A Wonderful Life-inspired romance novel.

Hopefully November will be calmer.


* Unless you’re a stranger. I don’t want hugs from people I don’t know.

Bark at the moon.

Sara Mazariegos

Am I the only one surprised that Halloween hasn’t happened yet?

It’s not that I’m in a rush. I’m excited about our party this weekend, and I’ve even considered wearing my costume to work this year (a slightly toned-down version to not be distracting.) But October has been dragging its feet. I say that as someone who’s had a hectic month.

We watched the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame inductions last weekend, with a break to see Saturday Night. It was great to see Peter Frampton finally get honored. He and Ozzy Osbourne could commiserate about their muscular ailments; it’s sad to see inclusion body myositis and Parkinson’s disease affecting such energetic, youthful rock stars. I know they’re getting up there now, but still! I wish them both well. Combined with the fact one of the other inductees (Phife Dawg from A Tribe Called Quest) died of diabetes complications and another (Jimmy Buffett) died of cancer, I kept thinking “I wish we could find cures for all of these things.”

Saturday Night was delightful. It left me wanting more, which is a good thing. We came home and I just had to watch the very first episode of Saturday Night Live, so I could see the moments referenced in the movie. I’ve been a fan since the early nineties when Dana Carvey and Phil Hartman were on. Some of the movie felt a bit like a play, which works since it’s all about live performance, and some of it felt a bit like parody. Some of the impressions were better than others. For example, I liked the Jim Henson guy as Jim Henson, but his Andy Kaufman was a little off, not least of all because he’s even ganglier than Kaufman. It’s a shame Benny Safdie had to drop out. I bet he would’ve been good.

On the writing front, I’m clawing my way to the finish line with my magical cat transformation romance story. One thing I’ll need to work on with it is tightening that description. 😅 Then, almost immediately after finishing that one, I have my It’s A Wonderful Life-inspired romance to rewrite. That will be nice during the holidays.

I’m going to use the NaNoWriMo method of writing around the same amount each day, although skipping Thanksgiving because I do have a life. Honest. I’m avoiding the actual NaNoWriMo site this year, though. I don’t support what they’re doing lately. Since my novel is longer, the draft will be “finished” in mid-December. And then I can breathe again before the edits! Weee!

Before you ask (why would you ask?) I’m planning to take a mental break from the cat story until sometime next year. It’s messy. I always knew it would be. Don’t all novels start out a bit messy?

Trying to find something between a strict writing schedule and a looser one that still doesn’t let me just, you know, stop writing. It’s dangerous to become too lax.

I like the word “lax.”

“I, myself, am… strange and unusual.”

Sara Mazariegos

Coming back to work is difficult, especially with how busy I seem to always be these days. I’m doing my best to take deep breaths and handle tasks one at a time, so I don’t feel so overwhelmed.

Our anniversary trip to Cleveland was nice! We ended up having an impromptu day on Sunday because it was rainy and we didn’t feel like trudging through a cemetery (as fun as that can be). We ended up going to the Museum of Natural History instead, which includes a wildlife center with foxes (red and gray!), bobcats, a raven, and even an adorable albino raccoon. It was a highlight of our trip, for sure.

The Rock n’ Roll Hall of Fame was also a lot of fun. It’s changed quite a bit since I was last there in the 2000s. Many of the people I like don’t have much in the way of displays anymore, except for The Beatles, of course. The Beatles will always have a big display there. I was a little sad to see Kate Bush’s display is already gone, to make way for this year’s inducted people, I suppose. There was also nothing about Peter Gabriel. But it’s still a great museum! I might have to hunt the archives to find out where certain memorabilia can be found…

Something that might have been predictable: I didn’t write very much on my vacation. I wrote approximately 400 words yesterday before my brain said, “No! I want to relax!” So, now that I’m back to work, I’m going to play catch-up this week. I’ve already thought of changes I want to make in my story, but I’m determined to complete this draft first, then I can make changes… After working on my other story. I can rest again when it’s Christmas. 😅

We’re looking forward to hosting our annual Halloween party soon. Luis worked hard on creating an ‘escape room.’ We’ll have to double-check that everything still works before the party and that the cats haven’t moved things out of position (as cats are wont to do.) I’m eager to see our friends solving the puzzles. It should be so fun. We’ve done murder mystery parties before, but never a full at-home escape room.

October is our busiest month. Can you tell? It’s also my favorite!

“Have you ever talked to a corpse? It’s boring!”

Sara Mazariegos

Happy John John Sean Day to all who celebrate! Today is the birthday of John Lennon, John Entwistle, and Sean Lennon, in that order.

Our trip to Tacoma went well. The ceremony was brief and not as overwhelming as I thought it might be. We also went to the zoo and spent time with my cousins and my cousin’s son, so that was nice. I’m realizing now that it’ll be slight whiplash going from that trip (which involved long flights) to going on our next trip this weekend (shorter flight, but literally this Saturday so not a lot of time between.) At least I didn’t experience much jet lag.

Being back at work has been a drag thus far, though.

I wrote a decent amount on Monday, largely because I took a sick day to recuperate. I highly recommend giving yourself a day after your vacation to rest. Better chance of mentally preparing.

Yesterday, I was so slammed with work that I couldn’t write very much, which made me feel bad but I don’t write well when I’m already feeling burnt out, so I let it slide. I’ve reached 60,000 words though! I’m within the last 20% of my story. The path forward is clear. And then… my reward is more writing because I want to rewrite my holiday story in November-December.

Am I crazy? Yeah, maybe.

I just got an email from the library. I have to return House of Leaves way before I’ve finished it. I’m not surprised. I’ll just put it on hold again. 😅 It’ll give me time to finish the other two books I’m reading. I definitely overdid the library books last time.

Maybe I should just buy it. It’s such a slippery slope.

Werewolf Seduction, spooky, scary.

Sara Mazariegos

I have a good problem to have. We’re flying this week, and I have three library books. I’m planning on taking the one I’m currently reading that’s a manageable size (House of Leaves is massive so that one can stay home.) I also have another book, A Werewolf’s Guide to Seducing a Vampire, that I’m really looking forward to reading but I’m trying to finish one of the others first. As a slow reader, I didn’t mean to have three books at once! But I’m juggling them as best I can.

So I can’t decide if I should bring the smaller book I’m reading (Bride by Ali Hazelwood) or the werewolf/vampire book. I shouldn’t bring both, because of limited bag space.

As I said, it’s a good problem to have.

The other night, we watched Cat People, which is a spooky movie featuring the song by David Bowie. It was good, not as cheesy as I expected, and it stars a bunch of actors I like. It’s my first real exposure to Annette O’Toole (not like that! Though she is topless in a scene…) There are three actors with connections to Catherine O’Hara in it — Annette O’Toole is married to Michael McKean who’s her frequent co-star in Christopher Guest movies; Ed Begley Jr. is frequently in movies with her as well; and John Heard is her husband in Home Alone. Interesting coincidence.


In writing news, I’m plugging along. I’ve been doing more making it up as I go along than usual, but it’s been enjoyable to write.

The other day, I thought of a good opening line for a different story. It would be nice if my brain could focus on the story at hand, but I’ll write it down for the future.

Speaking of the future, we’re going to Washington State this week for my grandfather’s celebration of life. I bought a black dress for the occasion, but I’ve since been informed that people should wear brighter colors because it’s going to be more like a party than a funeral. I have no idea what to expect; I just hope my family will be nice.

Then I work a week before Luis and I head to Cleveland for our anniversary!

But more on that next week. 😉

Throughout history, every mystery ever solved has turned out to be Not Magic.

Sara Mazariegos

I’ve been feeling the witchy vibes more this year, probably because the novel I’m currently writing involves a witch. We also recently watched The Witches of Eastwick and the first episode of Agatha All Along. I like that you can be creative with witches; they don’t all have to be hag-like or even bad. Obviously, this is proven in The Wizard of Oz, but it’s still nice to be reminded of how varied they can be.

I’ve never seen or read Wicked but I’m hoping to see the movie when it comes out this year. The book lives on my shelf to be eventually read. I love The Wizard of Oz so I feel a little “hmm” about it. I have to go into it with an open mind.

One thing I’m slowly teaching myself (read: forcing myself to learn) is to write even when the words/sentences are coming out very basically. It’s difficult to turn off the critical parts of the brain that think, “This could be worded so much better!” or “This scene could be described much more visually!” But if I allow myself to stall because things aren’t immediately coming to me as well-written novels, then I’ll never actually get the story written. They say the first draft is you telling yourself the story. I’m trying to lean into that more, and just imagine out the plot. I can make it pretty later.

That doesn’t mean I haven’t been surprising myself occasionally with turns of phrase, humorous dialogue, or even imagery that I thought I couldn’t master this first go around. I’ve been sharing the best of these with Luis, so he can enjoy them. It remains to be seen how much will stay in the story. This is a first draft, after all. And, by law, it’s a mess.

I leave you with this beat poem by Tim Minchin that’s been playing in my head at times lately. I had it memorized at one point before I had more important things to remember. 😛

Inner North London, top floor flat, all white walls, white carpet, white cat, rice paper partition, modern art and ambition… (Okay, I still have the beginning memorized)

Until next time, best wishes!

Where the f did Monday go?

Sara Mazariegos

This has been a weird year. I’m repeatedly struck, when I look at my calendar, at how bonkersly* everything has gone down so far. Things started out normally, but then April happened and kind of torpedoed things.

I can’t believe we’re nearing the end of September already. When my husband and I bought tickets to see Electric Light Orchestra (next week!) we were in a different circumstantial place, in many ways. One in which going to a concert after work on a Wednesday was totally fine.

Now, with Luis’s job restructuring, Wednesdays are busy days for him. I’m sure it will be fine, but it’s strange to think how quickly things can change. Makes planning for the future difficult, but it’s so necessary. As I’ve said, having things to look forward to really helps keep me going.

My boss is out this week, so I’ve had a fairly easier-going time. That doesn’t mean it’s been easier for me to get writing done, though. I have a “funny” mental block sometimes when I’m at work. I feel guilty for writing even though I have the free time in which to do so. I’ve just got too good of a gosh-darn work ethic, I suppose.

I’ve been having a difficult time reaching my target word counts lately. I think I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed with all of the plans we have coming up, and it’s a busy time of year in general. I haven’t had to move the goalposts yet, but I fear I may end up writing this current story longer than I initially intended. I’m not going to stop writing it; I’m going to give myself the grace to finish it in my own time.

Two of my family members died this year, within a few months of each other. And one of my friends died. It’s only natural that I’d be feeling a little mentally drained, right?

I keep telling myself I’m making excuses. But sometimes excuses are valid, aren’t they?

*I know it’s not a word, but you know what it means, don’t you?

“Though it be not written down, yet forget not that I am an ass.”

Sara Mazariegos

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice was as good as an unnecessary sequel could be. I enjoyed it, though it’s not as good as the original. We saw it with someone who said he liked it more than the first one. He’s a crazy person.

We finally finished the third season of Stranger Things. I started watching the show again after seeing Inside Out and wanting to see more of Maya Hawke. 🫣 I don’t really care about the others; I’m watching it for Robin and Steve.

I started reading House of Leaves at Luis’s recommendation. It’s over 700 pages and due in two weeks. We’ll see if I can finish it or if I’ll have to put it on hold again. It looks like a textbook! But it reads more like a spooky story. I have no idea what to expect.

Writingwise, things aren’t too shabby. I’m at 32K words now, but planning to reach 34K by the end of the day. I hit a big plot point with only a little blushing. This story is fun, even if I’m not sure how well it would do in the literary market.

Luis and I are planning to go to California/Disneyland next February. I’ve only been there once, so I’m very excited. It’s also exciting to explore such a different area with him. I wonder if we’ll see any celebrities this time. (Last time, I saw Alan Cumming eating lunch, Eric McCormack out with his kids at Universal, and Arsenio*… he appeared kind of out of nowhere and was excited to be recognized.)

We’re mainly going to “tourist” places this time, so we might only see fellow tourists. I shan’t hold my breath about running into any famous people.

This weekend, we’re going to our second Spirit Halloween (hopefully.) Finding open stores isn’t easy, but it’s early yet. I’m so excited for Halloween season! I’m always on a quest for more Haunted Mansion stuff.


*”WOO WOO WOO!” I think that’s how to spell it.

Why are you shaking like a leaf?

Sara Mazariegos

The timing of this post turned out to be more prescient than I thought it would be. Good lord. I planned to write about how I feel less pressured/guilty when writing without NaNoWriMo or any other progress tracker looming over me. I’ve been keeping track of my word count each day simply by putting it into my calendar, and I gave myself a loose end goal of 2 weeks before NaNoWriMo+ starts…

Now I suppose I should feel even less concerned about using the official NaNoWriMo site. They’re apparently allowing their users’ writing to train AI and other such nonsense. 😲 I’ll stick to Pacemaker, thanks. I still plan to write/revise a novel in November through mid-December, but I won’t use NaNoWriMo’s website to help motivate me. It’s unfortunate for all the young writers who look forward to it each year. I hope a lot of users leave it and stop donating.

My current novel is easy to write, somehow. It helps that I carefully outlined it and I’m playing with some quirky fantasy ideas. It feels like there are fewer rules with magical romance. As long as there’s a happily ever after. (Of course there is!) Some people think it’s unnecessary for a romance to end happily, but they’re wrong.


Speaking of the rules of romance novels, I’ve noticed for at least the second time that the book I’m currently reading — this time it’s The Dead Romantics by Ashley Poston — has such negative reviews on Goodreads that I keep thinking “Did we read the same book?”

I know different people have different tastes, but people can be so heated and mean on there. I happen to LOVE this book, if it’s not obvious. It’s a spooky love story with ghosts, gallows humor, and even a few Haunted Mansion references! What’s not for Sara to like?? I got a copy from my local library but I have since put it onto my gift wishlist because I feel I must own a copy.

Nine out of ten times, I want to own the book I’m reading.

Speaking of spooky stuff, we’re seeing Beetlejuice Beetlejuice this weekend! It got better reviews than I expected. I’m relieved. I still doubt it’s better than the first one. It’s hard to be better than Tim Burton’s best movie.

Falling for the first time.

Sara Mazariegos

Reader, I make no secret that I have unilateral hearing loss. When I was about two, I had a too-high fever treated by (according to my mom) a too-high dose of medication administered by a military base doctor. The little hairs in my cochlea were destroyed, so my right ear is purely for symmetry aesthetics.

Aside from not being able to hear on that side (think George Bailey) I also don’t have great balance. This was exemplified on Sunday. I was walking with my husband, a bit distracted by distant firetrucks, when I tripped on the sidewalk and fell. I scraped my left arm pretty well, bleeding near my elbow and scratches all along the side of my hand. I also bruised both knees (no holes in my jeans, though! Explain that!) And I have a mysterious scrape on my right wrist and a tiny one on my right middle finger’s knuckle. For three days, my body was sore, and moving my arms was achy. I’m finally feeling more normal today, except for an annoying persistent ache by my elbow where I took the most damage.

I didn’t break or sprain anything. I didn’t even damage my glasses. Luis said he was worried I’d hurt my “pretty face” and he was impressed that I caught myself so I didn’t hurt myself worse.

I can’t remember falling like that before. I’m sure, since I have bad balance, I have taken falls before but they must’ve been when I was a kid. I remember falling off my bike, but that’s a different situation. I trip often, but this was the first time in recent memory the pavement beat me. Falling felt so strange, too. As it was happening, everything felt like it slowed down and sped up at the same time. When I first tripped, it felt like a normal, run-of-the-mill trip and I’d just catch myself. But then I kept falling and I got scared. I yelped out something like “Noo!” that I remember thinking, even at the time, sounded so silly.

When Luis came to see if I was okay or needed help, I started laughing. I had a choice in that moment, to start crying or to laugh it off. I chose laughter. It was close, though. Pain is painful and falling is scary.

And that is why I didn’t write on Sunday or Monday. I rested my body and allowed myself to recover instead of trying to type through the pain or think of cute things when I was feeling freaked out by the experience. I’m glad I don’t fall often. I’m afraid of that particular part of sidewalk now.

I wrote over two thousand words yesterday, so my story is no worse for wear.

I was thinking yesterday about the unhelpful thoughts I give myself sometimes. It’s like an anti-pep talk. I tell myself “It’s okay, you can stop now. You don’t need to write more.” Even though I want to write more and my writing goal for the day is totally attainable. For example, yesterday I made my goal be to reach 18K words from 16K words. That’s my normal word count goal (on a good day) so it’s no problem. But sometimes my mind plays tricks on me and starts wanting me to slack off. I got to 17K and fought with my mind until I pushed myself to 18K. Because stopping at 17,500 words is not okay on my watch.

I know how to fall and get back up without breaking anything, not even my glasses. Two thousand words can’t keep me down.